Parenting Resilience During the Holidays

Full Webinar Transcript

Introduction and Panel Overview

Host: Thank you everyone for joining our parenting resilience webinar focused on navigating the upcoming school holidays. If you have questions, please submit them through the Q&A box as we go. I will now hand over to our panel.

Bev: Hello, I am Bev, the Collaboration, Education, and Empowerment Coach with ADHD 360.

Phil Anderson: Welcome, everyone. Bev leads our non-medical interventions and coaching programs. My name is Phil Anderson, Managing Director of ADHD 360, and I will hand over to Lisa.

Lisa Mangle: Hi, I am Lisa Mangle, Clinical Director at ADHD 360. I oversee clinical assessments and manage our team of clinicians.

Balancing Structure and Flexibility During School Holidays

Host: Bev, as a mother yourself, could you share your perspective on managing school holidays?

Bev: Reflecting on when my children were younger, I was working while living with undiagnosed ADHD. During school breaks, I felt a lot of working-parent guilt, which led me to cram as many structured activities into each day as possible. We had regimented schedules starting early in the morning, which ultimately became overwhelming for both my children and myself. Over time, I learned that I needed to pace myself, relax my expectations, and allow us simply to exist without rigid timelines.

Phil Anderson: That balance is essential. There is a clear distinction between running a high-pressure “military operation” and maintaining constructive scaffolding. Robert Brooks’ theory of scaffolding highlights how structure must still accommodate downtime and free space for children.

Bev: Following my own diagnosis and my son’s subsequent diagnosis, I realized the key was adapting to his specific needs rather than forcing my own expectations. Holidays are a crucial time for children to recharge their batteries before returning to school or college. Involving him directly in decisions about activities ensured the structure remained supportive rather than restrictive.

The Importance of Continuous ADHD Medication Management

Phil Anderson: Lisa, we often hear queries regarding “drug holidays” or taking breaks from medication over school breaks. Could you outline our evidence-based clinical perspective on this?

Lisa Mangle: The concept of “drug holidays” stems from outdated views that individuals outgrew ADHD in adolescence. Today, we recognize ADHD as a neurodevelopmental and genetic condition. Medication is not solely meant to support academic or occupational performance; it supports overall life functioning, emotional stability, and social well-being.

Lisa Mangle: Many patients experience significant benefits in their personal and social lives when consistently medicated. While clinicians may adjust dosing schedules or transition patients to short-acting formulations during holidays to manage appetite or daily schedules, complete treatment interruptions are generally discouraged.

Choosing the Right Physical Activities for ADHD Children

Phil Anderson: Regarding sports and physical activities, children with ADHD often struggle with waiting or queuing. In traditional static sports like baseball or rounders, waiting in line can induce frustration. Instead, fast-moving, continuous activities—such as tag rugby, running, cycling, or swimming—are far better suited to keeping children actively engaged.

Bev: I completely agree. Structured sports that require prolonged waiting, like trampoline clubs with strict rotation turns, can lead to boredom. Fast-paced, dynamic activities like trampoline parks, beach walks, cycling, or nature hikes allow children to release energy naturally.

Bev: Incorporating frequent physical movement breaks throughout the day stimulates dopamine and noradrenaline production, which directly supports the executive functions needed for focus and self-regulation.

Strategies for Motivation and Managing Procrastination

Phil Anderson: When motivating children to study or complete tasks during breaks, setting up positive reward structures is far more effective than relying on punitive measures. Collaborative scheduling allows parents and children to establish clear intervals for work followed by defined periods of downtime.

Bev: Identifying individual motivators—whether gaming, visiting friends, or outdoor hobbies—is key. Another valuable coaching technique is “planning to procrastinate.” When faced with a overwhelming project, such as an essay or study session, set up an outline with key bullet points before stepping away. Returning to an outlined document eliminates the barrier of starting from a blank page.

Understanding Meltdowns, Baseline Dysregulation, and Melatonin

Phil Anderson: Lisa, could you address questions regarding sleep aids like melatonin and how medication impacts emotional meltdowns?

Lisa Mangle: Regarding melatonin, continuous use can occasionally lead to perceived tolerance in some individuals. In such cases, taking planned breaks over weekends under medical guidance can help maintain efficacy.

Lisa Mangle: Regarding emotional regulation: children with untreated ADHD often operate near their emotional threshold. Small frustrations can push them over their limit, causing intense meltdowns. Effective ADHD treatment lowers this baseline internal stress, creating a wider buffer zone before a child reaches crisis point.

Recognizing ADHD Presentation in Girls

Lisa Mangle: ADHD affects individuals regardless of gender, but presentation styles can differ significantly. Girls often internalize symptoms or mask their struggles at school by staying overly helpful or compliant. As a result, schools may report no noticeable issues, while the child experiences severe emotional exhaustion or explosions once back in the safety of the home environment.

Lisa Mangle: Unrecognized masking can lead to anxiety, low mood, or internalizing struggles later in life. If parents observe significant behavioral distress at home, they should trust their observations and seek appropriate clinical evaluation regardless of school reporting.

De-escalation, Co-Regulation, and the CASPER Framework

Phil Anderson: It is vital to view emotional outbursts at home through the lens of psychological safety. Children release bottled-up stress where they feel most secure. Managing parental emotional responses during these moments is critical to co-regulation.

Bev: When a child becomes dysregulated, adults must avoid escalating alongside them. To assist parents, we recommend the CASPER framework during school holidays:

• C & S (Consistency and Structure): Maintain regular wake-up times and predictable daily schedules to ease transitions.
• P (Planning and Prioritizing): Involve children collaboratively in selecting activities and setting expectations.
• E (Exercise): Incorporate consistent daily physical movement to aid executive functioning.
• R (Refresh and Self-Care): Ensure parents dedicate time for self-care to maintain their own emotional regulation.

Sleep Hygiene and Holiday Self-Care for Parents

Phil Anderson: Maintaining solid sleep hygiene practices remains essential during holiday breaks. Setting consistent caffeine cut-off times, incorporating evening walks or relaxing baths, and establishing predictable wind-down routines support healthy sleep patterns for the whole family.

Bev: Parenting neurodivergent children requires immense resilience. Practicing intentional self-care—even through small daily routines—helps parents recharge their emotional reserves so they can effectively support their families.